Another song worth listening to....

I told you before that it seems like everytime I turn around I meet someone or hear a song or see a video expressing how much God loves us.. AS WE ARE.... apparently it's a message that bears repeating.. over and over again. :)

Watch this awesome concert video.. take the time... you're worth it. :)




My favorite line, besides the repeating of how HE LOVES US.... is
"When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory. And I realize just how beautiful You are, And how great Your affections are for me."

Being loved and reminded of that love, is so much bigger than all my struggles. His love eclipses my pain... no wonder I've always been in awe of watching an eclipse. ;)

The Real Me

I heard a song tonight that stopped me in my tracks as another beautiful representation of what I've been learning about in the past year or two.

It seems like I keep hearing more and more people coming to this realization and hearing more and more songs that express it to the world... God sees us for who we really are.

It's so wonderful to know that He created us perfectly and loves us perfectly. All this pretending and masking and hiding and covering is not necessary.

I spent the better part of 2007 trying to force my body to look as worthy as my heart.

Then I spent the rest of 2007 feeling shame and guilt for both failing at keeping my body at that standard, and at being misled along the way.

When all the while, the Lord has been loving me.. the real me... just as I am. Both fat and skinny, over eating, and starving. He knows who I am... not based on my performance or my appearance.

Listen to this song by Natalie Grant

Foolish heart looks like we're here again
Same old game of plastic smile
Don't let anybody in
Hiding my heartache, will this glass house break
How much will they take before I'm empty
Do I let it show, does anybody know?

[Chorus:]
But you see the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me completely
I'm loosening my grasp
There's no need to mask my frailty
Oh,Cause you see the real me
Painted on, life is behind a mask
Self-inflicted circus clown
I'm tired of the song and dance
Living a charade, always on parade
What a mess I've made of my existence
But you love me even now
And still I see somehow
But you see the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me completely
I'm loosening my grasp
There's no need to mask my frailty
Oh,Cause you see the real me
Wonderful, beautiful is what you see
When you look at me
You're turning the tattered fabric of my life into
A perfect tapestry
I just wanna be me
But you see the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me completely
I'm loosening my grasp
There's no need to mask my frailty
Oh,Cause you see the real me
And you love me just as I am
Wonderful, beautiful is what you see
When you look at me

I want to be me... I want to be who I really am- and I want everyone who meets me to know the real me. I think I've grown up enough to be able to handle it if someone doesn't like the real me. Because it really doesn't matter anymore... the only opinion that matters is already formed based on full knowledge of who I am.

Psalm 139:13-16 The Message

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother's womb.
I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day.

What the heck is inner beauty anyway????

Exactly 1 year and 4 days ago today, I started the Kimkins.com diet. I started it with the best of intentions, and even named my journal appropriately... "Ready to match my inner beauty".

Regardless of the hassles and dangers and craziness in the past year because of Kimkins.com the root of my journey still relies on just that... inner beauty.

While reading in my Bible the other day, I noticed that the "chapter heading" on The Message Translation in 1 Peter 3 said, "Cultivate Inner Beauty". I got my highlighter pen ready and devoured the words as if they were a krispy kreme donut!!! :)

Verses 1 thru 7 seem to be a message to wives and husbands. But, if you really read it closely you'll see an important message.
I'll post in both NIV and The Message translations:

1 Peter 3:4 NIV
Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight".

The Message
Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in.

Later in vs. 6b it uses Sarah as an example.

NIV
You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.

The Message
You'll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated.

While the context is that of a wife married to an non-christian man... the actual descriptions are of INNER BEAUTY.

So... according to these few verses.. inner beauty is:
being gentle, kind, having a quiet spirit (unanxious), being brave (unafraid) and not intimidated!

We can have this inner beauty because the Lord is our confidence. (Proverbs 3:25) He will keep us safe and sound.

I have never looked at being unanxious or unitimidated as qualities to describe inner beauty... and yet, here it is in plain English.

And I recognize that the anxiety I have allowed to take a foothold in my life in the aftermath of the eating disorder called Kimkins.com is hindering me from cultivating my innermost desire.


Now, lets dig even deeper. Skip over the husband stuff.. and read on in 1 Peter 3:8-9

NIV
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another, be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.

The Message
Summing up: Be agreeable, be sympathetic, be loving, be compassionate, be humble. That goes for all of you. No exceptions. No retaliation. No sharp-tongued sarcasm. Instead, bless- that's your job, to bless. You'll be a blessing and also get a blessing.

So, more examples of inner beauty for us all:
Be in harmony with one another!! That means, not squabbling or fighting or causing meaningless arguments. Not stubborn advancement for "self"

Be sympathetic- comfort those who are hurting
Be loving, compassionate, humble.

And, here is some of what NOT to do:
No retaliation! That means, no revenge.... not even with the tongue (using sarcasm or hurtful words)

And final we get blessings when we give blessings... and to quote Psalm 34:5 we have one more mention of inner beauty:

NIV
"Those who look to Him are radiant, their faces are never covered with shame"

I want to be radiant... not thin.
I want to cultivate inner beauty... not become worried and fixated on my outward appearance.

I now see that once again, the Word is the answer to all of my questions and I rest assured that while the Lord is my confidence, I will not fail at becoming the bride he intends me to be for Him. With a repentant heart, I can now seek that inner beauty with much more direction than I did last year.

I know where I can get some inner beauty for free!!!


He's already paid my fee, and made it possible for me to have all these qualities!!!